As the much-loved Fluffy Elephant of Time paraglides towards the Bouncy Castle of Fate and wonders why it’s blocking the Landing Pad of Destiny, we realise that the Old Year is likewise headed for a rubbery conclusion and reflect on what a year it’s been.
Anyway, the notion of nonimating my fluffy self for this year’s Mr Eric Blair Awards was making its way through my fluffy head, and it occurred to me that I am a MUCH more famouser author than him so I should be handing out awards of my OWN… and here they are!
First, the Memorial Mr Lembit Opik Asteroid Award for making a BIG SPLASH goes to Mr Mark Reckons not just for probably the most influential blog post of the year, but also for the House of Comments podcast (although, is it just me or does it come out a bit QUIET on the old iPod?), for being Director General of the BBC, and for his general ubiquity this year!
The Mr Sir Christopher Lee Genuine Sith Lightning Award for blasting Master Irfan goes to the Honourable Lady Mark for blasting Master Irfan!
The omigod he looks like Mr Stephen Tall’s gay brother Award goes to Mr Matthew Goode (aka Ozymandias, the gay-one-who-is-obviously-the-villain in the Watchpersons movie) as seen on Film 2009!
The omigod he DOES look like a Sontaran Award goes to Mr Andy Hinton… he knows why!
And finally, the COVETED top prize, the Award-winning Auntie Alix Mortimer Award for Awesomeness goes to… Auntie Helen for all her hard work being the SECRET MASTERMIND behind the Lib Dem Blogosphere, for reading the Sainted Earl Conrad, for knowing that the next decade doesn’t start until 2011, for getting her initials – HD – on every new flatscreen telly in the country, for remaining UNSHOCKABLE in the face of all that Auntie Jennie and the Honourable Lady Mark could muster, and for all round general being brilliantness!
So, with that happy announcement, I now offer a glance back at some of the events that have made up 2009, (which might also be a few suggestions for what I might submit to the Orwell Prize 2009 committee! Any other suggestions from anyone more than welcome!!).
Ten entries on "The Very Fluffy Diary of Millennium Dome, Elephant"
On Mr Charlie Brooker in the Guardian denouncing the Sinister Minister, Mr Jack Straw, and Hard Labour in general:
Ten Entries on "Liberal Democrat Voice"January:
…and With Very-nearly-almost-but-not-quite-President Mr Governor Howard Dean:
ten five more Elephant Interviews
- Day 2988: For the Purposes of this Interview, I shall be a Donkey - Millennium "Donkey" Meets Howard Dean
- Day 2988: If your local party is a bit rubbish… who you gonna call? – Millennium Elephant meets President Ros Scott
- Day 2990: How I bottled out of asking Mr Vince if he was going to slash higher education and the army
- Day 3184: A Personal Commitment but no Apologies from the Leader – Nick Clegg meets Millennium Elephant… and some other people
Here’s to more fun in 2010. Have a Happy New Year, everybody!